Branded

Radiation is a new experience for me. Despite all my cancer treatments, I have never gone through it. Well, here it comes....

On Tuesday, I went for a process called a C-SIM. Not sure exactly what it stands for but it is step one in preparing for the literal radiation treatment. You lie on a very hard ct scan table. Then the tech creates a mold to hold my arm in position and to keep my head still during the literal treatments. Then he lined up my body just so, where it was perfectly situated on the table. Scans were next. He consulted by phone with a dosologist (yes, that apparently is a real thing) and the radiation oncologist to make sure everyone was happy and can move forward with the mapping.

Finally, I received three tattoos. While they are relatively small dots (one in the middle of my chest and then one on both sides of my chest), I won't lie. I felt branded. They will never go away, just like all the scars. I wanted to cry as I laid there with these conflicting emotions flooding over me.

And that was that. Next up is a trial run next Friday. I guess I will go through all the motions of the actual radiation treatment, just without the radiation. I begin the real deal the following Monday, February 5.

I close by sharing the good news. Every day further away from chemo I feel a bit better, a bit stronger, and a bit more like myself. As the poison leaves, I return.