I am climbing out of the deep and dark pit I've been in.
I have spent most of this past week angry, bitter, resentful, and withdrawn. I have pushed everyone away and refused to talk about what's going on.
I have gone from doctor appointment to doctor appointment and otherwise been in bed. Each doctor appointment challenged me and my tolerance for acceptance. Things could be WAY worse. But I have been struggling to put all the pieces together.
I have a responsibility, I feel, to not let my children, and everyone else, frankly, know I am in the pit and to stay cheery and positive. I set the tone, right? So I have done my best to hide where I am really at. Everyone doesn't need to know, nor benefit from, knowing every little detail of what's going on or how I feel about it. So it's been an interesting challenge.
Thank you to all of you who heard my pain and understood me. Thank you for giving me the space to work through it. I have made a lot of progress. I guess we are all entitled to the time to process and the time to cope. Thank you for giving me that. And for those of you who reached out, I apologize for my lack of response. I simply wasn't ready. I had to climb out.
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